The extra bonus for a psychopathic-parent is that he can repeat this for a very long time and the child has no way of going NC, if the child gets as far as understanding what is going on then hard work has been done (mostly by the caring parent sometimes with the help of a good therapist).In other words whereas in a normal relationship people influence each other, with a psychopathic-parent he exercises his power over his children and feels entitled to this - plus the psychopath has 'a legal right' to this, the law does not distinguish between types of relationships.
Yes, I have been where you are, experienced what you are likely experiencing in your love addiction. I understand the obsessing, confusion, and anxiety you likely are dealing with right now...
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Here you can make it more difficult for him if - in time (a long time) - he is excluded from the kids' activities as much as possible and gets more clueless about what they like and how their life with you is.
And even when the children do adore their psychopathic-dad it will still not be enough, it never is.